Dear Friends,

Do you complain often? If you do, beware, it’s actually bad for you!

When someone wrote to the Rebbe complaining bitterly about his life, the Rebbe’s incredible response was that it was his own negative attitude that was hindering his success! His choice to overlook the great blessings of marriage and children that G-d had showered upon him was repelling his ability to experience more abundance in his life. An attitude of gratitude is the key to prosperity.

In answer to your letter . . . in which you write of the current state of your affairs, adding that “all my life, no good has befallen me” . . . It seems that you are unaware of the contradiction in your letter.

For a man whom the Creator has provided his partner in life, and has blessed them with children, to say that, “all my life, good has eluded me,” is ingratitude in a most shocking Manner…

Hundreds and thousands of people who pray every day to be blessed with children, and would give all that they have for a single son or daughter, have yet to merit it (may G-d bless them with the speedy fulfillment of their heart’s desires), while you, who received this blessing (seemingly without an overabundance of praying for it) do not recognize what a treasure and joy this is, writing as you do in your letter…

My point is that perhaps the reason for your weak health and your difficulties in earning a living is your utter failure to appreciate G-d’s blessing to you in a far more basic matter than perfect health and abundant sustenance — the blessing of sons and daughters who follow the ways of G-d. When one does not recognize the explicit good bestowed from Above, particularly when one’s lack of recognition is so extreme that it results in statements such as you express in your letter, is it any wonder that blessings are not forthcoming from Above in other matters?”

This principle is fundamental to the Jewish approach in how G-d chooses to operate: What you give is what you get, and you’ve got to be careful what you pray for.

When we’re thankful for what we have, we’ll end up having more. When we focus on what we lack, we’ll never have enough. Emphasizing the light attracts even more light; obsessing over darkness keeps us in the dark. No one likes a grouch.

When G-d sees us graciously thanking Him for what we have, He gets inspired to give us ever more!

Being grateful is so vital to our lives that it’s actually a mitzvah. In the opening of this week’s Torah portion, we are commanded to gather our first fruits and joyously bring them to the Temple in Jerusalem in order to verbalize our gratitude to G-d for the bounty He has bestowed upon us. Unlike any other Mitzvah, the Torah states that the reward for this Mitzvah is the highly desirable assurance of life in the year ahead and the ability to do this again next year.

The Torah is clearly showing us that G-d provides abundantly when we are in a state of gratefulness. Contemporary philosopher Eckhart Tolle comes to the same conclusion when he says that: “acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance.”

We see this truth unfold in what is one of the most heartbreaking episodes in all of the Torah. The Torah tells us of two women who struggled deeply with infertility, Rachel and Chana. After many years of persistence and prayer, they both conceived.

After Rachel bore her son Joseph, she conceived again and died while giving birth to her son Benjamin. Chana proceeded to give birth to six more sons after her son Samuel (the Prophet) was born.

The shocking difference lies in their respective attitudes. Whilst Chana sang a song of gratitude to G-d after Samuel’s birth, Rachel had no time for gratitude. She was fully focused on the next son as soon as Joseph was born. In fact she named him Joseph, meaning “more,” to express her deep desire for what she lacked.

With deep sensitivity, the Rebbe encouraged the letter-writer to force himself to be happy, and explained that this was for his own good. Serving Hashem with overflowing joy will immediately initiate a reciprocal response from Heaven that will cause your blessings to overflow in all matters dear to you. Thus the Rebbe concludes his letter:

“My hope is that these few lines will suffice to open your eyes to see your situation in its true light. And when you begin to serve G-d with a true and inner joy, surely G-d will increase His blessings also in regard to health and sustenance…”

Don’t be upset when there’s a detour on the way to your destiny. Keep your spirits up and that’s what will make it all work out!

So the next time you feel like you need to kvetch, think for a moment about the energy it will fetch!

Wishing you a Shabbos of counting your rainbows, not your thunderstorms.

Rabbi Dovid Vigler is director of Chabad of Palm Beach Gardens.

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